Kindness Counts. Our Costco Story.

It seems there have been several viral posts lately telling stories of kindness.  Many of these articles have been written by parents thanking strangers for sympathetic words and encouraging deeds.

How awesome.  We need more stories that demonstrate the fact that empathy can overcome judgement.  Selfless acts from strangers can impact the lives of people and whole families.

So I am adding the following account to the mix.  I don’t know if it will ever reach the eyes or ears of the woman I’m about to thank…but her kindness is worth telling as an example for us all.

To the Costco Member Services Employee,

My boys were at basketball practice so I had some time to kill with my girls (ages 2 & 5).  It was a good time to pick up my Christmas Photo cards and replace my lost membership ID. 

By the time I got to you, my 5 year old daughter was spent.  She was done.  You and I were in the middle of taking care of my membership card when you witnessed my tired little girl starting a tailspin that would have ended up in a “Parent of the Year” disqualifying scene.

This is the point when random store employees in the past would have put on their annoyed or angry eyes.  I’ve experienced many of those looks and quite honestly have become immune through the years.  I give a lot of grace to people passing judgement because I remember a time before children…and certainly before adopted children…when I was probably one of them.  I’m certain that if I sat each of those people down and shared our harrowing story, their eyes would have softened and shown understanding instead.

But you didn’t need an explanation.  I don’t know why that was.  Perhaps you had found yourself in a similar circumstance before.  Maybe you recognized the escalating behavior as the plea of a tired child instead of a disrespectful tantrum.  Whatever the reason, you thoughtfully engaged my little girl in conversation.  Her furrowed eyebrows and pouty lips didn’t scare you.  You kept on chatting and then you hit the jackpot!  “Do you want your picture taken with mommy?  You can have your face on the card too!” 

My daughter was so excited.  Everything from there on out just made her day: Posing for the picture, watching it print, holding on to the card for dear life and showing it with pride to her brothers. That membership card is still one of her favorite things and she talks about it … months later.

You probably knew that you were being kind to a child and helpful to a mom.  What you didn’t know was that we had adopted this sweet, brave, beautiful girl six months before following almost 3 years in foster care.  Because of resulting insecurities and fears, anything out of our normal schedule (like an errand to Costco) takes a lot of energy for her to endure.  She has to fight back the fear of present unknowns and angst over what will happen next in this strange day. 

By the time she got to you, she WAS tired…not just physically, but emotionally.  When you gave her that jolt of joy, you gave her the ability to finish our day well.  A victory!  As a bonus…a really profound bonus…you gave her just a little more evidence that she is our daughter. 

She is a part of our family. Our hearts say so.  Our actions say so. Our words say so.  A judge says so.  We’ve even made up songs that say so!

Now our Costco membership says so too.

Thank you.